My Trip to the U.S.A. TREASURE OF BAGHDAD'S DIARY

December 30

It won’t be a long time for me to go back to Baghdad. I have a mixed feeling now. I am happy and sad. Many people warned me not to be upset for coming back because I’ve already known that I am going back. But I am a human being. I am supposed to have feelings and I just cannot hide these feelings. Today, it was very obvious that I was upset. J and J2 noticed that. They thought I am tensed because I have to see the White House and the U.S. capitol alone. That wasn’t the main reason. What made me upset is that I am going back. It’s hard to accept this but I am going back, no doubt. The question will be, am I going to be able to come back to the U.S. in the future? I live in Baghdad where I am exposed to danger in every single second in my life. I don’t know what my fate will be. I don’t know whether I am going to stay safe to come back to America and take my M.A. or not. I don’t know whether I would be able to tell my children and niece how great and beautiful America was. However, I miss my family and friends who are dying in every single minute and not many people feel of how they live. I wonder if there would be people living in Iraq from now on.

It was a good chance for me to walk. I needed to walk, just walk for hours. I needed to hear my parent’s voices. I called them and talked to them while I was walking. I needed to hear my mother’s lovely voice. I needed to hear my father’s bold voice. I needed them. I wish I could save them from the hell they live in now. I wish I could take them outside Iraq, away from car bombs and killings. I wish I could do something to stop what is happening in Iraq. I wish and I wish but I can do nothing.

I don’t know till when we have to be strong and endure what is happening? Till when we have to endure listening to the sounds of explosions and shootings? Till when we have to see dead people everyday? Till when we keep saying we are sad? Till when we have to live in a war zone? Till when we have see destruction?

I lost hope since the Shiites took power. I am a Shiite and I wish I weren’t. The Shiites who are governing us now are back to power. They won the elections and means there would be more killings and revenge. Yes, these Shiites were in exile and they are now killing and causing destruction to the country. They are killing and killing and neither the Americans nor the people are stopping them. Moreover, The foreign terrorists are destroying the country by doing what Talaban regime used to do in Afghanistan. This country is burning. Somebody should do something. Please, somebody should do something. I am helpless, just helpless.

There is a line in a famous Arabic poem that says, “The ones you are calling for are dead.” So there is no benefit from what I am saying here I guess.

Any way, I had a tour in Washington DC today. It’s just today I discovered how beautiful Washington is: The streets, the people, the buildings and the monuments. After I had my hair cut, J and J2 went to the photo studio to take pictures for J’s book advertisement. By myself depending on the map J drew, I made my way to see the White House and the US capitol. And here I was really in need of walking. I’ve quit smoking since last April, but just today, I wanted to smoke. I really needed the cigarette. But as usual, I am Iraqi for God’s sake, I can make it. And I did it. I did not smoke!
When I was walking, I was just thinking that am I lucky or what? I can’t understand this puzzle. The only thing I am confident and sure of is that without J’s help and encouragement, I wouldn’t see America in entire my life, without her sister’s help, I wouldn’t be able to go to the University and intend to apply, and without her family’s loveliness and hospitality, I wouldn’t have such a beautiful time in America.

While I was walking, I was thinking of the pictures I took in Boston, New York City, Philadelphia, DC, and the other states. I realized that I won’t be able to put them in any of the frames I bought here. I cannot even hang them in my own bedroom. I have relatives and friends who do not know that I am in America. I am afraid if I put them and one of them would see them. The problem is that I am afraid that if they discover that, they might say it to strangers by mistake and by that I would be gone because they would consider me a “Spy in the lands of the Infidels”. Oh God! I hate this feeling. I’ll have to bury these photos in my closet or under my bed. My beautiful time I spent in the US is going to be buried.

There were many people gathering in front of the White House and the U.S. Capitol. Despite the fact I am going to hide my pictures, I took more in front of Washington’s most famous places. It is hard to tell your family that you did not take a picture there because you were afraid somebody might see it.

After that, I took the subway to TJMaxx, in Friendship Heights where I had lunch at McDonald’s and bought the Friends collection for O.

I returned back home at 8 p.m. J was waiting for me and she was a little bit worried because I was late. Anyway, when I arrived J looked different. She was putting make up. She looked so beautiful. In Iraq, women like putting make up a lot. “Wow! Look at you! You look so Iraqi.” This was the first time she puts make up on her beautiful face and the reason was for the photos of her book’s advertisement. I took pictures for her to show to my family. My mother and sister asked her why she doesn’t put make up. I think the reason is that most American women do not like putting make up, unlike the Arab women and I think this has to do with history. I remember once I read an article in a newspaper about this subject that says the Arab women like the Sumerian, Babylonian, and Egyptian women used to put heavy make up and decorate themselves with heavy gold necklaces.

EAST AND WEST

After that, I prepared something very strange for people to have in America. It was Hookah. J has a Hookah and all its equipments from one of our colleagues in Baghdad.
To change my bad mood, I showed J how to make it. It was one of the best Hookahs I made. Then we took it near the fireplace. We chatted, took pictures and sang on Kadhum Al-Sahir’s CD. While I was downloading the photos on my laptop, J brought dinner. This time, dinner was sear food. J cooked lobster and crab. She made them really good but I can’t imagine myself eating them. I am not used to.

I really had fun. I was interested in smoking Hookah because I sat near the fireplace which is considered a western thing. Now, east meets with the west. This is how it should be.

After that, J went to her room to call her mother and I spent some time in sending my pictures to my family and friends who know I am here.

New Year’s Eve

December, 31 [to be updated]

This morning, I woke up late. I had my breakfast while I was watching the news on the CNN. On their news bulletin, they show how violence marked the New Year’s Eve in Baghdad and other cities. Nothing is changed and nothing would change. The coming year would not be different. Mark my word dudes!

Then, they showed how the US army is transferring an Iraqi baby, Noor, for medical treatment in Atlanta. “Baby Noor, a 3-month-old Iraqi girl in urgent need of medical attention to treat a potentially fatal birth defect, is to arrive in the United States where she will receive treatment.” The CNN reported. Noor will be transported by ambulance to Children's Healthcare of Atlanta, the anchor said.

I was very delighted to see this. People in Iraq do not have an idea of how the US army is doing these things. The problem is most of the Arab media are biased and against the Americans in general. So they do not show this kind of programs to the Arabs. Instead, they broadcast programs hostile to the Americans which make the ignorant Arab people do not know how to distinguish between the American people and the American administration. And this is one of the hopeless things that I would never believe will change. It’s only the educated people understand this.

Then I checked my emails and checked if I received comments on my blog. I checked O’s blog as well and I found his new entry so miserable to the extent it brought tears to my eyes. He was alone, literally. None of his friends are there. I felt so bad. I wish I was there in that time.

New Year’s Eve for me is just a normal boring day. I’ve never felt happy in it. And why should I be happy? I’ve been waiting for years to see things better and nothing of this happened. There is a tradition among my family on this night. We turn off the lights and count from 12 to 1 till the hour becomes at midnight to start the New Year. After that, my mother distrubtes sweets and candy, a sign to start the year with sweet thing, hoping things would change. and of course, these are just superstitions which I don’t believe in. I’ve been doing this for many years and nothing is changed. Every year becomes worse than the one before. So I decided that I will never eat any sweet thing tonight because I am confident nothing would change. Huh! I spent last year’s Eve attending a funeral of one of my relatives.

J was very sick today. She had a cold. She is struggling to keep herself awake. We went out and bought some groceries. When we returned back, I made O call me. J and I talked to him for about an hour. He was bored and lying on his bed preparing to sleep. It was almost 9:30 p.m. there. His family, as most of the Iraqi families now, decided to not celebrate the New Year’s Eve.
The best way to spend the day was to watch a movie. I was going over J’s DVDs and I found a movie that I thought it might be nice to watch. Captain Corelli’s Mandolin, was the name of the movie.

In 1941, Italy allies with Germany and ruthlessly conquers the much weaker country of Greece. On a remote Greek island, an Italian artillery garrison is established to maintain order. One Italian officer, Captain Corelli, adopts an attitude of mutual co-existence with the Greeks and engages in such activities as music festivals and courting the daughter of a local doctor. In 1943, however, after Italy surrenders to the Allies and changes sides in the war, Captain Corelli must defend the Greek island against a German invasion.

[TO BE UPDATED]

Tonight is the New year’s Eve. I was invited by R, my former Baghdad Bureau Chief. I went to his dinner party. something personal bad happened to a friend of mine and I was about not to celebrate this night with anybody. Anyway, J convinced me to go and have fun there. I had fun there because all the people I met were friendly and have high sense of humor which I really needed at that night.

I wish I can express everything here, but I can’t.

Happy New Year!

My Trip to the U.S.A. Treasure of Baghdad’s diary

December 25, Christmas day

Before I came to the U.S., Hassan, O, J and I chatted about my trip the night we invited Hassan for dinner. “You will be in America during Christmas,” J said. I was so excited to the extent I kept the whole night thinking of this and imagining the streets and houses decorated with Christmas lights. I remember how happy I was at that time. Finally, I celebrated Christmas in America.

Although I am far from my beloved family, I felt I am home. J’s family was like my family. We share a lot of things. J’s mother is so lovely and friendly. I never found a woman in her kindness and beautiful smile. I just now discovered where J got her smile from.

Since I arrived to their house, I had terrible cold. J and her mother were like my mother and sister. They made this cold disappear.

Last night I felt so tired and exhausted. However, I was very happy to be with J’s family in the church late at night. But what made me really tired is thinking of the situation in Iraq and how miserable life is becoming day after day. What hurt me is my family’s fear.

Anyway, I couldn’t go with J and her mother to the morning service as I was really tired. J said it’s fine and I don’t have to be there.

At 10 o’clock, I woke up, had my breakfast and checked my emails. My cold was getting worse and worse although I am having medicine to stop it. J and her mother arrived at about 11 o’clock.

In order to feel better, I had a hot shower. After that I dressed up to enjoy Christmas day. J, her mother, and I sat in the kitchen and started talking about how lovely our office in Baghdad used to be. J asked me to tell her mother the story of Little N, and the letter he wanted me to send to her when she was in America last year. We laughed for a long time.

J decided to make Turkey for lunch with different kinds of food. After she finished cooking, J, her mother, her brother and I took some Christmas photos next to the tree and the presents.

Shortly after that, J’s aunt and her husband arrived to spend Christmas in Decatur with her family.

J’s aunt is a lovely, nice, and calm woman whose smile never left her face, just like her sister, J’s mother. Her husband, Uncle E, reminds me with my uncle who looks like him and has the same friendly company.

J, her brother and I went to pick up their 94 years old grandmother from their aunt’s house. Then, we all went back home.

It was supposed that J2, P her husband, and A their cute son could not come to Decatur as J2 is pregnant and might not be able to endure the 2-hour flight and the 2 hour-drive after that. She told her mother that she “cannot come for Christmas”. When I was in Philadelphia, J and J2 decided to surprise their mother by having J2 and her son and husband celebrate Christmas.

On the way back home, J called her sister to see if they have arrive Decatur to surprise their mother. She found out they have arrived. So, both of the cars met near the house and parked in front of it quietly and carefully. We did not to make J’s mother discover the surprise easily.

I took the hand of their grandmother to help her on the stairs. Few moments later, J’s brother entered the house carrying A, J2’s son. “I found this kid in the garage Mom!” he said. She was shocked. Then J2 entered the house. Her mother froze in her place. “Oh my God!” she said hugging her daughter who came from a far distance to surprise her mother. She was very happy. I could tell from her eyes that were filled with happiness tears. Then, we told her the whole story.

Lunch was ready by that time. We all sat for lunch. J’s brother read the prayer while everybody held the hands of the other. For me, that was very moving specially when he mentioned me in his prayers thanking God for my presence there.

Time to distribute presents started shortly after lunch as J2’s son did not endure waiting more.

J and her brother distributed the presents and when they finished, we opened them. The moment we opened these presents reminded me with last year’s Christmas in our Baghdad Bureau. It was one of the most beautiful days in my life. Every one of the staff bought a Christmas present for J and our former bureau chief K. J did the same. On Christmas Eve, J, her mother and I flipped over the photos. Her mother was so happy to see how the staff loved her and how she considered each one of them as part of her family. There is no doubt that everybody knows the comedy “Everybody loves Raymond”, but now it’s time to say “Everybody loves J.”

After opening the presents, we went to J’s family most favorite tradition on Christmas day. We went to the Bowling club J’s family own. The club was closed but for the members of the whole family; aunts, uncles, cousins, and their sons and daughters. We spent some time there and returned back late at night.

December 26,

Today, we went to J’s brother’s new apartment. It was fascinating, big and comfortable then J’s aunt and her husband went back home. We then went to have dinner. This time we had pizza in one of the family’s favorite pizza restaurant, The Monical’s.

December 27,

Today we left Decatur to go to Chicago. Our flight back to Washington is at night. At noon, J2 and I went for shopping. this time I wasn’t buying things for me. I was shopping for my sister and mother.

When I returned back, J went to ship her Christmas presents through FedEx. By that time, I stayed in the yard in front of the house enjoying the nice weather. The tempreture was 52 degree F. the weather was just like I have in Baghdad in winter. I called my parents, chatted with them and then helped J2 in taking out their luggage and mine at the garage door to get ready to put it in the rented car they rented.

P, J2’s husband, drove the car. The trip took us about 3 hours. J and I took the train to our airport. Our flight was delayed 25 minutes. Finally, we arrived to Washington at 2 a.m.

It took us about 30 minutes to get our luggage and take the shuttle bus to the parking lot where J parked her car. J noticed that the fuel in her car has almost disappeared. We tried to find a gas station that is open at 2:30 a.m. Finally, we found one. But, when J was just turning on the engine, it did not work! “You must be kidding me!” J said. “Oh oh!” that was the last thing I ever expected. We tried and tried but in vain. There was a man responsible on the gas station. We went to him to ask for help. It looked like he wasn’t in the mood to help that day. He was even reluctant to turn on the microphone to talk to us through his closed windows.

Fortunately, there was a nearby Motel. J and I went there and booked two rooms for one night. By the time, I put my head on the pillow, it was 3:30 a.m.


December 28,

J called me by phone to wake me up at 8:30 o’clock telling me that she went to the gas station and was able to turn on the engine by the help of some of the gas station workers. We checked out and went directly to her house. I looked terrible and the problem is that I was supposed to go to the newsroom to spend sometime with another editor in the paper who spent some time in Baghdad last summer. I took a very quick shower preceded by shaving my beard. Once again, I had another thing to do. My suit was in the bag. I need to iron the shirt and the trousers. Ah! Trust me. I did all these things in 40 minutes. Finally, I was ready for going to the paper. I did not believe that I am going to make it. But I made it.

J and I arrived a little bit late. I saw the Editor. He was very happy to see me. “Al Salamu Alaikum”, he said the moment he saw me. I was very happy to see him as well. He is one of the most favorite people I worked with.

Then, we had some coffee in the newspaper’s cafeteria. I told him about my trip to the US and how I am enjoying it and about getting the M.A. in writing. After that we returned back to the newsroom. D, the AME, was waiting for me. “I have an assignment for you B,” he said. I was excited. This is the first assignment I have in the newsroom.

I worked for some time and then the editor I mentioned above invited me for lunch. We had our lunch in a restaurant near the paper. On the way back, we passed by Starbucks. Heehee. Of course, I had my daily regular coffee. By the way, the editor I am talking about is like me, addicted to coffee.

We finished work, and then J and I left back home. We had dinner and relaxed.

Christmas Eve

My Trip to the USA... Treasure of Baghdad's Diary

December 24

The first thing J and her family do in the morning of Christmas eve is going to the cemetery where her father and her other relatives were buried. This year, the Iraqi joined them. I heard a lot about J’s father who was a the model she and her sister were following beside their mother. I was excited to go to the cemetery and read “Al-Fatiha”, the Opening Chapter in the Holy Quran. Muslims read this chapter when they visit dead people’s graves in cemeteries.

This was the first time for me to go to a cemetery of Christians. I was impressed by the design of the cemetery and how people put flowers at the tombs. J and her mother put flowers on his tomb and then wished him a Merry Christmas.

After we left the cemetery, we went for another quick shopping for Christmas Eve and day. Then, we returned back home.

Today, I called my parents. They were very happy to hear my voice. “Are you sick?” my mother found out immediately. “How did you know? I’ve been talking to my dad for 20 minutes and he did not find out I am sick,” I told her. “I know through your voice.”

Anyway, I found out that there is something wrong going on there as well. “What is happening Mom? Anything happened?” I asked her. She hesitated for a second and then said, “It’s getting worse and worse here.”

I did not know what to say to her except asking her to be patient. “We’ve endured a lot Mom. Let’s endure more and more. There should be an end for this one day.” I wanted to make her feel happy but I couldn’t. The only thing i was able to do is to make her forget about the situation for 20 minutes telling her my adventures in America and how I am enjoying the holidays with J and her family.

After that, I logged on my Yahoo messenger and chatted with a friend of mine who lives in Baghdad. He does not know I am in America. He thinks I am in Amman. Literally, only few people know that I am in America. If many people knew this, I would be considered “a spy” visiting “the lands of the infidels”. And of course, I would be killed without any hesitation by the bastards. My friend told me that it is getting really dangerous and now he no longer trusts people he doesn’t know. “Killings and kidnappings increased after the elections in addition to the problems of the elections turn outs,” he said. He told me to stay in “Amman” for few months. I told him I cannot. I have work to do in Baghdad. “Are you crazy? You have to listen to me,” he said. I refused to listen to him and told him, “I cannot. I am coming back soon.”

After I talked to him I was upset for some time. I couldn’t even move from my bed where I was lying when I was chatting with him. I updated my blog for hours in order not to be sad on Christmas Eve. I am supposed to be happy today.

At 7:30 p.m., J, her mother, T, and I had dinner. J made the most delicious lasagna I’ve ever had. At 9, I took a shower, dressed up in my dark blue suit and blue tie. J, her mother and I took many pictures with the Christmas tree.

Then, all of us went to St. Paul’s Lutheran Church to attend the Christmas Eve Service. I was the only Iraqi and Muslim attending this service. However, I was welcomed by many people, including the pastor who thanked me for visiting the United States. When we were all singing the Hymn of Adoration, I loved the line that says, “Peace on earth, and mercy mild.” Within my heart I was praying and asking God to provide peace on Iraq. specially, these days.

At the end of the service, we lighted the candles. My eyes were full of tears hoping that one day Iraqis would live like normal people. I looked at the candle and the melting wax. I felt the candle was crying for me, crying for all Iraqis, crying for every child killed by a bomb, crying for every mother and father suffering in Iraq, crying for the whole nation. The candle was crying but it was lightened to give us hope and faith in God saying that God is always there. He is watching and He is the one who will bring peace on earth and peace on Iraq.

Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas

To everyone everywhere,

I wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. I hope peace be in allover the world.

My Trip to the U.S.A. Treasure of Baghdad's Diary

December 20

Since I arrived the United States, I was invited once for dinner and that was in NYC when Joel Simon and his wife invited me dinner a week ago. Today, R, my former bureau chief invited me for dinner in his house in Washington DC.

I woke up at 9 o’clock, had breakfast and read the newspapers while J who was sick today got ready for today’s shopping. I decided not to go to the newsroom today as I have many things to do before going to Illinois where I am going to celebrate Christmas with J’s family.

In the newspaper, I read an article about a transit strike in New York City, the city that never sleeps. The strike came after failing to reach a deal with the Metropolitan Transportation Authority following days of bitter labor talks. Today, New York was thrown into chaos by the height of the morning rush hour.
This strike was supposed to take place on Friday. That is why I left New York City on Thursday. I did not want to be stuck there and miss my train to Philadelphia. If that happened, I would be very embarrassed as I was supposed to meet with the people at St. Joseph’s University.
After I dressed up, I turned on the TV set to watch the news. MSNBC was having a live broadcast of a session of Saddam’s trial. Saddam, as usual, was complaining. This time he said he was tortured! Ok, let’s suppose he was tortured. Now, did he forget what he did to the Iraqi people for 35 years? Did he forget how he made the people starving at the time he was giving Jordan electricity and oil for free? Did he forget how built his mansions on the Tigris while the government employee’s salary did not exceed a $1.5 per month? I just want to ask him stop COMPLAINING. At least leave some respect to the people for what is left in your life.
I was furious enough to the extent I turned off the TV and got ready to go out shopping. J and I dropped off S home and went shopping. It was almost midday. I suggested having breakfast. “You mean lunch,” said J. I laughed and said, “You are right.” We went to a Mexican restaurant. Since I arrived I had different kinds of food. The most favorite for me now is the Mexican.
After lunch and shopping, we returned back home. J’s house yard was full of leaves that have been falling since she was in Iraq. When she came back, she did not have time remove all of it. I offered help. She and I took the leave blower which I like a lot and swap the whole area surrounding the house. It took us about an hour and a half but if J did not have this blower, it would have taken us four hours at least.
J was invited to R’s dinner party as well but she couldn’t come as she had cold and she began to feel miserable specially after we swap the yard of the house. I had hot tea, checked emails, and took a shower. Then, J called for a taxi to take me to a barber shop near R’s house. when I arrived there, i tried to open the door but in vain it was locked. I saw people having their haircut inside. So I knocked. A Mexican man said, “sorry, we are closed.” I was shocked. I told him, “Listen, I am invited to a dinner party and I won’t to go there in this shape. You gotta help me. My hair doesn’t take that much of time.” one of his workers said she can do it. Finally, I had my haircut. After that, I walked to R’s house. it was freezing but while I was walking I found Starbucks coffee shop. Of course, I bought my regular coffee and walked to warm up.
At 7:25 p.m., I arrived to R’s house. I was the first of the guests. I found R cooking for the first time in my life. He was my boss in Baghdad and I never saw him cooking. “You can call me M now,” he said mentioning our former cook in Baghdad.
R, the friend is different than R the boss. I felt very comfortable with him this time. we are friends and colleagues. Although he has a high position in at the newspaper, Assistant Managing Editor, R looked very simple and friendly.
He gave me a glass of wine while we were chatting. I took a tour in house. it was the first time I see such a beautiful house after J’s house. I can say both of them have the same taste.
His house was decorated with Iraqi art and different art pieces from different countries. The house looked just like in the fancy magazines we always buy. A big painting by an Iraqi artist was hanged over the fireplace which looked so overwhelming. The dinning table was unbelievable furnished with a beautiful sheet, wine glasses, plates and a glass vase filled with a bouquet of beautiful white and red roses. The place was much amazing than I can describe.
Then four of R’s friends arrived. They were famous and brilliant journalists working in the same paper I am working in. one of those whom I really liked was D, who joined the paper since two years ago. She is considered one of the active and brilliant reporters of the paper. She was a reporter with the Associated Press for a long time and most of her reporting as a foreign correspondent was in Indonesia. She and I talked about a lot of stuff, including our office and our work in Baghdad.
R made wonderful dinner for us. After we finished he presented the desserts. An hour later, 11:30 p.m., we left.
I returned back home and prepared my luggage while J was sleeping. Tomorrow, we are going to Illinois.


December 21

It’s time to go to Illinois. J and I woke up early, prepared our luggage and went to the airport. The first stop was Chicago.

We were on board of South West airlines. The airplane was very warm to the extent that I felt very hot. J felt the same.

When we arrived the airport in Chicago, we went to the baggage claim to get our luggage. I got my bag but unfortunately J’s bag was missing. She went to the office of the baggage claim. They checked and told her they did not find it yet. We were shocked because all her Christmas presents were in it. We were so sad but we couldn’t do anything except going to the train station to get the train.

At the train station, J and I had lunch. I had Pizza from Pizza Hut and J had vegetarian soup. It was very cold. This morning, the CNN said the temperature in Chicago is 27 degree F. our next stop was Decatur, a small city where J grew up. We went there to celebrate Christmas among her family.

At the train station, J’s mother and brother were waiting for us. That was the first time I see them in person. However, I knew them for along time ago. Then, the four of us went to have dinner as it was almost 7:30 in the afternoon. Then, we went to their house after a whole day trip from Washington DC to Decatur.

December 22

For the first time since I arrived the states, I had cold. But it wasn’t too bad. It was just cold. J, her mother, and I spent most of the day shopping for Christmas. We had fun a lot. J’s mother is just like my mother, a woman full of life and happiness. Maybe you will say how come your mother is full of happiness while she lives in Iraq? I will say, she is unlike the other women. She is just full of life. I found many things in J’s mother in my mother. Well, the first thing is that both of them are teachers.

December 23

J hadn’t seen her grandmother for along time. Today, she and I visited her. The grandmother is her mid 90s. We went to her house, had breakfast with her and then went to an electronic store to buy a new digital camera for me. The one I use is Chinese and I didn’t like it a lot. so, I decided to buy a new and better camera. The one I bought was Canon with 4 Mega pixel.

After that, we returned back home, had lunch and then J went to continue her shopping. I did not feel well because the cold was killing me. So, I preferred to stay at home, take some rest and take a shower to get ready for today’s dinner which was supposed to be in a Chinese restaurant in the city.

At 6 p.m., we went to pick up J’s grandmother and met with T, J’s brother, at the restaurant. The restaurant was great. To e frank, I was shocked from the idea of being in a Chinese restaurant first. I thought that all I am going to find there are dogs and cats cooked and hanged.

This restaurant gave me a different impression. At the buffet, I was able to find all what I wanted but in a Chinese flavor. While we were picking up different kinds of food, J told me, “Take this.” I asked her, “What is this?” She replied, “FROG LEG”. I was shocked. I said. “What?!! You want me to eat a frog leg. Yeeeekh”.

When we returned back to the table, J’s dish was full of sea food. “Try this,” she said. I tried it and I found it good. “what is this?” she said “Crab”. Then I told her, “you mean this little thing that moves like this?” and I moved my fingers like a crab walking on the sand. She said yes and I was shocked again. My problem is that we do not eat these kinds of food at all and we always consider them as disgusting, no offense of course.

Anyway, I had my own special dish. After we finished dinner, we took J’s grandmother to her house. Before she descended off the car, she turned her face to me and said, “I was glad to meet you. If you stay with us, I would teach the way of life.” I was surprised. But I think she was right. She is an old woman who is 94. she lives in the world since along time ago and I am sure her life was full of adventures and experiences.

Before we returned back home, we made a quick stop at Mall then returned back home. J and I put on the Christmas hats and J’s mother turned on the audio player and put some classic Christmas songs. J and her mother looked so beautiful. They sat next to each other singing and wrapping presents. I joined them and wrapped the Christmas presents I brought with me from Iraq.

My Trip to the U.S.A. Treasure of Baghdad's Diary

December 14

This is my last night in New York City. I am very sad to leave. It became one of the things that I really liked. The buildings, the people, the streets, and everything were amazing. It’s full of life. I got this impression about New York when I was in Baghdad. O told me it’s hilarious and J said “you are going to have so much fun in it”.

At 7 p.m., Ivan and I went to Time Square. I wanted to see it for the last time because I might not be able to see it once again. Who knows what would happen? Am I going to stay alive or am I going to be dead? I am not pessimistic in what I am saying here. It’s a matter of thinking and expectations.

Anyway, my main aim to go to Time Square was to make my family see how amazing it is through the video I took. After that we met with Heidi and had another tour, but now it was in the biggest toys store in America, Toys R us. To be frank with you, I was amazed of this store. So what about the children? I immediately remembered my beautiful 3-months old niece whom I miss a lot. I bought a small cat toy for her and Heidi suggested I buy a small funny frog. I bought them and made Ivan film that. It was funny, so funny.

This is last time I spent with Heidi who is off work tomorrow. She gave me a nice present which was an audio CD of the original motion pictures soundtrack of Beyond the Sea. I like it a lot, listened to all of it’s songs and liked the fourth song in it, Simple Song of Freedom.

Today, I was also invited for dinner in Joel Simon’s house. I arrived 30 minutes late. I was very embarrassed for being late. Joel has a nice house, looks stylish and comfortable.

Before I arrived to their house, he has already ordered some Moroccan food called Tajeen. It looked like my mother’s Iraqi food. It was very delicious. While we were eating, we talked about me, my family, the way we live in Iraq, the kinds of food we have and how I work and live and stay alive in Baghdad in the middle of the chaotic situation the country is going through.

I couldn’t see his cute daughters this time. They were sleeping as they have school the next day. I wished I could film them and show my family how cute they are. Because it was freezing outside, Joel offered to drive me to the hotel.

I really enjoyed the dinner and really felt how nice Joel and his family are.

December 15, 2005

Today I am leaving to Philadelphia to meet J’s sister and her family. I am going to call her J2 in my posts from now on. I am very much excited to see them but at the same time, I am so sad I am leaving the CPJ. I liked this office a lot. I liked the staff and everyone in it. They were very friendly and helpful. They considered me one of them. I liked the way they work and how much effort they do to help journalists in allover the world.

Yesterday, I was invited to give a speech about my experience as an Iraqi reporter covering news in Iraq. I was very excited. Sitting in the middle, I started the speech of how I as an Iraqi reporter working for a western newspaper mange my work in one of the most dangerous places in the world now. Everyone was silent. I was able to see how amazed they were. I think they found my stories as strange as the stories of the Arabian Nights.

This morning, I was really reluctant to take the subway carrying my entire luggage with me. I stopped the first taxicab I saw in the street. He took me from Brooklyn to Manhattan where the CPJ office is.

The moment I arrived, O called me. I was very excited to hear his voice because I miss him a lot. I talked to him for more than half an hour and then I called my parents to see if they voted or not. My father picked up the phone. He said he and my mother voted today. His voice was very confident and he was laughing in the phone out of happiness. I was able to hear my mother who was telling him that she misses me. “I miss you a lot mom,” I said to my father to pass to her.

After that, I checked the newspapers and blogs covering the elections in Iraq. Then, Ivan said if I feel hungry and if we can go to grab some lunch. Maria, a Columbian researcher at the CPJ joined us. “What do you feel?” she asked. My answer came directly, “Sad”. I felt sad because I really liked the staff at the CPJ and I did not spend longer time as I have many other things to do while I am here in the States.

We returned back and then all the staff gathered in the lunch room where we were having lunch. Joel Simon thanked me for the time I spent with them and then he gave me a book as a present. I was really impressed. It was “Leaves of Grass” of Walt Whitman, my favorite American poet. The book was signed by all the staff who wished me luck in my career. Then Judy suggested giving me one of the T-shirts with the CPJ logo on it. “Thank you, this will protect me in Baghdad!” I said told them and they all laughed.

“My desk would be empty,” I told Ivan while we were waiting for my train to arrive. Ivan nodded his head.

I am definitely going to miss Joel Companga’s everyday Iraqi Arabic greeting to me like “Shako Mako” [Hey,what’s up?], I’ll miss Alexis’s smile and addiction to work, I’ll miss Kristine’s calmness and delicate smile, I’ll miss Alex’s nice personality and friendship whose knowledge of wars and violence exceeded all the limits, I’ll miss Joel Simon the friend and the brother, I’ll miss Judy’s motherly talk and smile, I’ll miss Ivan’s unbelievable coolness every time, I’ll miss Maria who so quickly became the friend of everybody, I’ll miss Nina’s loud and beautiful smile. I’ll miss all of them and everything in them.

My train arrived at 3 p.m. Ivan helped me in carrying one of the bags I was carrying with me. Then, time to say Goodbye came. I don’t know how I am going to be away from these guys, specially Ivan who became one of my best friends. They will be always in my mind.

I arrived Philadelphia at 5 p.m. and looked for P and A. P is J2’s husband and A is their 3 and half years-old son. They were supposed to meet me at the train station. I saw them and waved to them. That was the very first time, I see both of them. I was excited and happy. We went out to the car. It was raining. Then, we went to their house to put my luggage there and grab some dinner. My first impression about P is that he is a kind of educated man who seems to have a lot of information about most of the things around the world. He’s been to many countries for work and tourism and I think this enriched his knowledge in many countries culture. A, his son who is only three years and a half looked so cute and smart. The moment I entered the house, I saw him collecting his toys which he likes. He was the first child I see smart enough to memorize all the names of his toys.

P, A, and I went out walking to a nearby restaurant to have dinner. It was still raining but we were well covered. The neighborhood was just amazing. The houses looked like those we see in movies, all made of wood decorated by Christmas with gardens covered with snow that increased their beautiful sight.

The Committee to Protect Journalists

ABOUT CPJ

The Committee to Protect Journalists is an independent, nonprofit organization founded in 1981. We promote press freedom worldwide by defending the rights of journalists to report the news without fear of reprisal. Below are answers to some frequently asked questions about CPJ.


How did CPJ get started?

A group of U.S. foreign correspondents created CPJ in response to the often brutal treatment of their foreign colleagues by authoritarian governments and other enemies of independent journalism.

Who runs CPJ?

CPJ has a full-time staff of 23 at its New York headquarters, including area specialists for each major world region. CPJ has a Washington, D.C., representative, and consultants stationed around the world. A 35-member board of prominent journalists directs CPJ's activities.

How is CPJ funded?

CPJ is funded solely by contributions from individuals, corporations, and foundations. CPJ does not accept government funding.

Why is press freedom important?

Without a free press, few other human rights are attainable. A strong press freedom environment encourages the growth of a robust civil society, which leads to stable, sustainable democracies and healthy social, political, and economic development. CPJ works in more than 120 countries, many of which suffer under repressive regimes, debilitating civil war, or other problems that harm press freedom and democracy.

How does CPJ protect journalists?

By publicly revealing abuses against the press and by acting on behalf of imprisoned and threatened journalists, CPJ effectively warns journalists and news organizations where attacks on press freedom are occurring. CPJ organizes vigorous public protests and works through diplomatic channels to effect change. CPJ publishes articles and news releases; special reports; a biannual magazine, Dangerous Assignments; and Attacks on the Press, the most comprehensive annual survey of press freedom around the world.

Where does CPJ get its information?

CPJ has full-time program coordinators monitoring the press in Africa, the Americas, Asia, Europe and Central Asia, and the Middle East and North Africa. They track developments through their own independent research, fact-finding missions, and firsthand contacts in the field, including reports from other journalists. CPJ shares information on breaking cases with other press freedom organizations worldwide through the International Freedom of Expression Exchange, a global e-mail network.

When would a journalist call upon CPJ?

In an emergency. Using local and foreign contacts, CPJ can intervene whenever local and foreign correspondents are in trouble. CPJ is prepared to notify news organizations, government officials, and human rights organizations immediately of press freedom violations. When traveling on assignment. CPJ can advise journalists covering dangerous assignments. When covering the news. Attacks against the press are news, and they often serve as the first signal of a crackdown on all freedoms. CPJ is uniquely situated to provide journalists with information and insight into press conditions around the world.

STAFF

EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR

Ann Cooper

Ann Cooper worked as a reporter in the former Soviet Union, Africa, and Washington, D.C., before joining CPJ in July 1998. Her voice is well known to radio listeners in the United States from her nine years as a correspondent for National Public Radio (NPR). She has also reported for The Louisville Courier-Journal, Capitol Hill News Service, Congressional Quarterly, The Baltimore Sun, and National Journal magazine. Appointed as NPR's first Moscow bureau chief in 1987, Cooper spent five years covering the tumultuous events of the times, including the failed coup attempt in Moscow. She co-edited a book of first-person accounts of that siege, Russia at the Barricades. NPR also sent her to Beijing to cover the Tiananmen Square pro-democracy movement. Based in Johannesburg, South Africa, from 1992 to 1995, Cooper's coverage there won NPR a prestigious Alfred I. duPont–Columbia University Award in broadcast journalism. She traveled throughout Africa, writing features and analysis on a range of subjects, including the famine and international intervention in Somalia, the 1994 Rwandan refugee crisis, and the cholera epidemic in Zaire. Returning to the United States in 1995, she studied refugee policy issues as a fellow at the Council on Foreign Relations in New York City and also traveled in Kenya, Rwanda, Zaire, Bosnia, and Haiti to produce a series on refugee policy for NPR. She has taught radio and international reporting at the Columbia University Graduate School of Journalism and is herself a journalism graduate of Iowa State University.

DEPUTY DIRECTOR

Joel Simon

Before joining CPJ as Americas program coordinator in May 1997, Joel Simon worked as the Mexico City–based free-lance correspondent for the San Francisco Chronicle. He is the author of Endangered Mexico: An Environment on the Edge, published by Sierra Club Books. His work on Latin America has appeared in numerous publications, including the New York Times, The Los Angeles Times, and the Columbia Journalism Review. Simon was promoted to deputy director in April 1999. He is a graduate of Amherst College and Stanford University.

EDITORIAL DIRECTOR

Bill Sweeney

Bill Sweeney joined CPJ in June 2004 after working as New York news editor for The Associated Press. From 2000 to 2004, Sweeney directed AP's coverage of New York City and the metropolitan area, including the September 11 attacks and their aftermath, the embassy bombing and millennium terror trials, the anthrax threat of 2001, and the financial crime trials of Martha Stewart and others. He came to the AP from The Hartford Courant, where he oversaw coverage of mental health and juvenile justice issues. At The Courant, he edited the series, "Deadly Restraint," which described the abusive treatment of psychiatric patients nationwide and prompted federal reforms. Sweeney is a graduate of the University of Connecticut.

SENIOR EDITOR

Robert Mahoney

Mahoney has been an editor, bureau chief, and reporter for Reuters in Jerusalem, Abidjan, Delhi, Jakarta, Singapore, and Paris. His most recent posting for Reuters was in London, where he was news editor in charge of politics and general news for Europe, Africa, and the Middle East. Mahoney has served as an editorial trainer for the Reuters Foundation, teaching reporting and writing to journalists in the Middle East. He has also worked as a consultant for Human Rights Watch, producing that organization's recent report on human rights violations in Ivory Coast.

WASHINGTON, D.C. REPRESENTATIVE

Frank Smyth

Frank Smyth began his career reporting from El Salvador in the mid-1980s. He has covered Guatemala, Rwanda, Colombia, Eritrea, and Ethiopia. In 1991, Iraqi authorities captured and imprisoned him while he was reporting on the Kurdish revolt in northern Iraq. His articles and opinion pieces have appeared in The Village Voice, The New Republic, The Washington Post, The Wall Street Journal, The New York Times, and Foreign Affairs. He also contributed to Crimes of War, a collection of essays on human rights and armed conflicts edited by Roy Gutman and David Rieff. Smyth has also served as an investigative consultant for the Human Rights Watch Arms Division and Amnesty International USA. He has collaborated with the International Consortium of Investigative Journalists. He is a graduate of Boston College and Johns Hopkins University School of Advanced International Studies. WEBMASTER AND

SYSTEMS ADMINISTRATOR

Mick Stern

Mick Stern has been a free-lance editor, technical writer, graphic designer, and teacher at several universities, including Syracuse University, Rutgers (New Brunswick), and New York University, where he is currently Adjunct Professor in the Department of Undergraduate Film and Television. Since 1990, he has been associated with the Barcelona-based Toni Ricart Multimedia Studio, which specializes in Web and CD-ROM design. He holds a PhD in English Renaissance literature from New York University.

DIRECTOR OF DEVELOPMENT AND OUTREACH

John Weis

John Weis joined CPJ in April 2004. He directs all fund-raising activities of the organization, both annual support and campaign contributions. He has a long and successful record as a fund-raiser, having most recently served as the deputy director of development at the Lawyers Committee for Human Rights (now Human Rights First). Weis has held fund-raising positions at WNYC Radio, the New York Public Library, and the University of Pennsylvania. He has a B.S. in Commerce from Rider University.

ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR OF DEVELOPMENT

Elena Snyder

Elena Snyder graduated from Colgate University in 1999 with a B.A. in English literature. In July 1998, she spent six weeks teaching grant writing to the Burmese Refugee Women’s Group at the Mae Sot Clinic in Mae Sot, Thailand. She has worked for the San Francisco Jewish Film Festival and the Mill Valley Film Festival. Prior to joining CPJ in January 2003, she was a student in graphic design at California College of the Arts, focusing on art direction for magazine production and Web site design.

JOURNALIST ASSISTANCE COORDINATOR

Elisabeth Witchel

Before joining CPJ in July 2001, Elisabeth Witchel worked in product marketing at Grassroots Enterprise, a San Francisco–based advocacy communications firm. Previously, she spent several years in Seoul, Korea, as a free-lance journalist. In addition to holding a B.A. in history from Stanford University, she has an M.A. in international studies and diplomacy from the University of London's School of Oriental and African Studies. Witchel has written for US News and World Report, The Korea Times, Travel Holiday, The Industry Standard, and Kirkus Reviews.

DIRECTOR OF FINANCE AND ADMINISTRATION

Lade Kadejo

Lade Kadejo holds a B.S. in accounting from Brooklyn College, where she also studied public and private finance at the graduate level. She has been in the accounting field for more than 18 years. Prior to joining CPJ in June 1999, she served as tax consultant and preparer for H&R Block and as finance officer for Aerotours International, an Australian travel wholesaler.

EXECUTIVE ASSISTANT AND BOARD LIAISON

Maya Taal

Maya Taal graduated from the University of Connecticut honors program in 2003 with a bachelor's degree in international political culture. She spent the fall 2002 semester conducting a grant-funded independent study in the Caribbean island of Martinique. Prior to joining CPJ, she worked in communications at Human Rights Watch in New York, Amnesty International in Peru, and MUDHA (The Haitian-Dominican Women's Movement) in the Dominican Republic. She also wrote for The Stamford Times in Connecticut. She speaks Dutch, French, and Spanish.

RECEPTIONIST AND OFFICE MANAGER

Janet Mason

Prior to joining CPJ, Janet Mason worked as an executive secretary, an administrative assistant, a scheduling coordinator, and a radio producer for various companies, including CBS, NBC, WYNY, and Deloitte & Touche. She holds a bachelor's in communications/journalism from the City College of New York.

REGIONAL PROGRAMSAFRICA PROGRAM COORDINATOR

Julia Crawford

Julia came to CPJ from the UN's humanitarian news agency IRIN in Nairobi, Kenya, where she spent 18 months as radio news editor. At IRIN, she was instrumental in the launch of radio programs for Burundi and Somalia, training and working with local journalists. Before that, she spent three years as project director and editor for the Hirondelle Foundation at the International Criminal Tribunal for Rwanda (ICTR) in Arusha, Tanzania. This also involved recruiting, training, and working with local journalists to cover ICTR proceedings and Burundi peace talks for local and international media. Julia previously spent seven years with the English-language service of Radio France International in Paris, where she specialized in African affairs and conducted several reporting and training missions to Africa, including reporting from Rwanda in French and English on the immediate aftermath of the 1994 genocide. Training missions included two courses for journalists from community radio stations in South Africa.

AFRICA RESEARCH ASSOCIATE

Alexis Arieff

Alexis Arieff joined CPJ in June 2003 as in intern in the Asia program. Since joining CPJ full-time in July, she has worked as a researcher in the Africa program and as an executive assistant. Alexis is a recent graduate of Brown University, with a degree in linguistic anthropology. She has lived and worked in France, as well as South Africa, where she studied the political organization of the Royal Bafokeng Nation, and Delhi, where she researched the role of language ideologies in contemporary Indian politics. She speaks French, Hindi, and Urdu.

AMERICAS PROGRAM COORDINATOR

Carlos Lauria

Originally from Buenos Aires, Argentina, Lauria began his journalistic career as a contributor to regional newspaper Diario La Unión, where he was promoted to managing editor. In 1991, he began working at Playboy Magazine Argentina and later became managing editor. In 1994, Lauria settled in New York City as U.S. bureau chief correspondent for the largest magazine publisher in Argentina, Editorial Perfil. In this position, he wrote and edited hundreds of stories that were published in the various magazines owned by the company, particularly Noticias, the world's largest Spanish-language newsmagazine. He has been invited to speak about the current crisis in Argentina by the American Jewish Committee (June 2002) and to discuss developments in the murder of photographer José Luis Cabezas, who worked for Noticias, by the Freedom Forum (April 1997). He is a journalism graduate of Universidad Católica Argentina.

ASIA PROGRAM COORDINATOR

Abi Wright

Abi Wright graduated from Barnard College with a degree in Russian studies. Most of her professional experience has been as a television news producer. She worked for two years as field producer in the NBC News Moscow bureau, spent several weeks in Iran putting together an ABC News documentary, traveled throughout the former Soviet republic of Georgia as an Internews consultant, and spent several months working with Memorial, one of the earliest and most important civic organizations in Russia, which has led the way in digging out information on Stalin's crimes against humanity. In addition, Wright has worked on numerous other documentaries and news programming for PBS, ABC, NBC, the Discovery Channel, and the Oprah Winfrey Show. She speaks Russian and French.

ASIA RESEARCH ASSOCIATE

Kristin Jones

Kristin Jones spent three years in Beijing, where she helped launch and edit an English-language monthly called That's Beijing and wrote for the South China Morning Post. Jones speaks Mandarin and Spanish and is a graduate of Reed College in Portland, Oregon. She has also written for The Nation magazine.

ASIA PROGRAM CONSULTANT

Shawn W. Crispin

Shawn W. Crispin was bureau chief for the Hong Kong-based Far Eastern Economic Review in Bangkok from 1999 to 2004, where he wrote on a wide range of political, business, and social issues. From 2001, Shawn also served as bureau chief for the Review's sister publication, The Asian Wall Street Journal. His coverage of Asia's AIDS epidemic was part of a package recognized in 2004 for the "Excellence in Magazines" award of the Society of Publishers in Asia. In 2005, Shawn served as an investigative consultant with Human Rights Watch (Asia), where he researched and wrote a full-length report on press freedom issues in Thailand. His journalism has also appeared in the International Herald Tribune and Institutional Investor magazine. Shawn received a master's degree in Southeast Asian Studies and International Economics from the Johns Hopkins School of Advanced International Studies in Washington DC in 1999. He speaks fluent Thai.

EUROPE AND CENTRAL ASIA SENIOR PROGRAM COORDINATOR

Alexander Lupis

After graduating from college, Alex Lupis spent 18 months in Washington, D.C., coordinating a medical evacuation program for war victims from the former Yugoslavia for the Geneva-based International Organization for Migration. He worked with refugees in the former Yugoslavia and then with the Open Society Institute in New York City, where he administered an exchange program for students and professors from Eastern Europe and the former Soviet Union. He later worked as a human rights monitor in Bosnia for the Organization for Security and Co-operation in Europe and as a consultant for Human Rights Watch. He returned to New York City to work with the Open Society Institute for two years, initially managing a Legal Policy Task Force for the former Yugoslavia and later acting as the special assistant for Southeastern Europe. Alex is fluent in Russian and Bosnian/Croatian/Serbian.

EUROPE AND CENTRAL ASIA RESEARCH ASSOCIATE

Nina Ognianova

Before joining CPJ in 2003, Nina Ognianova worked as a staff writer for the International Journalists' Network, the media-assistance Web site of the nonprofit International Center for Journalists (ICFJ) in Washington, D.C. She covered the countries of Central, Eastern, and Southeastern Europe. In September 2003, Ognianova coordinated an ICFJ conference, which was held in her native Bulgaria, for Balkan investigative journalists about covering the problems of human trafficking. Ognianova earned a bachelor's degree in journalism and mass communications from the American University in Bulgaria and a master's degree from the Missouri School of Journalism--Columbia. While in Missouri, Ognianova was on the editorial staff of the magazine of the International Press Institute (IPI), IPI Global Journalist, where she also published articles. Ognianova is a native Bulgarian speaker, fluent in Russian, and proficient in Macedonian, Bosnian/Croatian/Serbian, and Italian.

MIDDLE EAST AND NORTH AFRICA SENIOR PROGRAM COORDINATOR

Joel Campagna

Campagna was a consultant to Human Rights Watch from 1993 to 1996 and traveled to Egypt and Lebanon as part of fact-finding missions in 1994, 1995, and 1996. Campagna has lived and studied in Egypt and has also worked as a researcher for the Cairo-based Center for Human Rights Legal Aid. He has a master's degree in international affairs from Columbia University's School of International and Public Affairs with a specialization in Middle East studies. Campagna earned a B.A. at Fordham University, where he majored in political science.

MIDDLE EAST AND NORTH AFRICA RESEARCH ASSOCIATE

Ivan Karakashian

Ivan Karakashian graduated from the University of Nottingham School of Law in 2001. In June 2001, he joined MIFTAH (The Palestinian Initiative for the Promotion of Global Dialogue and Democracy) as Webmaster responsible for the organization's Web site content. He later became a senior analyst for the organization. Prior to joining CPJ in September 2005, he studied at Columbia University Graduate School of Journalism, where he concentrated in magazine writing. He speaks fluent Arabic.

VICTORY IS AHEAD

Although I am in America, far away from my beloved country, my heart is still there. All my passion and love is dedicated to the people who challenged danger to record the first real democracy in the history of Iraq. I am proud of you Iraqis. I am proud of your hope, optimism and patience. I am proud of every man and woman who went out to vote. I am proud of those stepped out of their houses to join their neighbors and relatives to vote.

I am proud that now Iraqis are really united and all of them went to vote, unlike what happened in the last elections. Sunnis, Shiites, Christians, Kurds, Arabs, Sabians, and Yazidis became all like one hand. They became the dagger that stabbed terrorism. I am proud of police and army and the electoral commission workers. Thank you thank you thank you. I wish there was another word that I can thank you with. “Thank you” is so little compared to your bravery.

Go to hell, Zarqawi. Go to hell Osama. Iraqis are brave and will never be afraid of your hatred. They are the ones who are going to defeat you and make the whole world gets rid of you and your henchmen.

The first thing I did this morning was I turned on the TV on the CNN to watch how the elections went in Iraq. A voting woman was speaking in English said, “We are celebrating the real democracy in Iraq.” she looked very happy and excited. I could tell how happy she was. Tears filled my eyes and the National Anthem came in my mind to increase these tears that were falling out of happiness.

My homeland….

Glory, beauty, sublimity, and magnificence in your hills

Life, safety, happiness, and hope in your air

Will I see you rise, safe, flourished, profitable, and dignified?

Will I see you rise reaching the Simak (a name of a specific start), my homeland?

My homeland.. The youth will not give up. Their goal is to achieve independence,

or they die

We don’t fear death and will not be slaves to the enemy

We don’t not want an everlasting humiliation and a miserable lifeWe don’t want that.

Instead, we will restore our immortal glory

My homeland….Sword and the pen, not words and conflicts, are our symbols

Our glory, vows, and sense of responsibility are our motivations

Our strength is an honorable aim and a waving flag

Bless you in your sublimity, defeating your enemies

My homeland….

Praise be to you Iraqis. Praise be to you God. Victory is ahead. Go for it.

My trip to the USA Treasure of Baghdad’s Diary

December, 12

Waking up at 7 o’clock wasn’t that bothering as it used to be in Baghdad. I was supposed to meet Joel Simon at Henry Street at 8:30. I left early and waited there for 10 minutes till he came. I crossed the street and had my daily regular coffee. It was cold, really cold.

Joel and his two cute daughters arrived at the corner where I was waiting. Then we walked with his daughters to take them to their school as their mother who is a journalist is assigned for reporting in another state. The school was so beautiful. It’s a church school that looks like the school where my mother used to teach. She used to teach in a Nun’s school, one of the best primary schools in Baghdad, called Dijlah [Tigris]. Because this school is located in the most dangerous street in Baghdad, Sadoun Street, my mother had to leave it and move to another school in my neighborhood. She decided to move after a massive car bomb took place at the main gate of the school where 22 Iraqi civilians were killed, most of them were pupils, school buses drivers and parents of pupils. I remember how my mother was scared when I called her that day. She was crying and crying and saying things like the kids are killed, it’s like hell and something like that. My heart sank at that moment. What does it mean when someone is trying to kill westerners in front of a primary school? Two westerners and 22 Iraqis were killed.

Looking at the kids in Joel’s daughters’ school, I remembered how cute children are in Baghdad when they walk with their parents happily going to school. I love the innocence of the children. Smile never deserted their faces despite their parents’ daily suffering and struggle to keep them alive and happy or at least satisfied.

The design of the school is just like the design of my mother’s previous school. It was built by Christians in Baghdad in 1923, just like the Jesuit school I attended.

On the way to the subway, Joel pulled out his New York Times newspaper and showed me an interesting article, “Boys of Baghdad College Vie for Prime Minister”. I was surprised. Oh my God! The most powerful leaders in Iraq now had studied in the same school I attended.

I bought a copy of the paper and read the whole article in the subway on the way to the office. I was surprised to see many people in the train were reading the same article. It was really good. When I arrived the office, some of the researchers and coordinators were talking about it.

While I was reading some newspapers in the lunch room, Alex, Europe and Central Asia Program Coordinator at the CPJ, entered. We had a long a long conversation about what do people feel under stress of war and assassinations in Iraq. he talked about his experience as he covered war in Yugoslavia and how people were suffering at that time. It was almost like what is happening in Iraq.

I finished my work and then Ivan and I had dinner in a nearby bar and grill. Then I returned back to the hotel. One the way back, I bought few things I really missed for along time, Pistachios, and Pumpkin seeds. After that I returned back, took a shower, and started reading articles and stories on the web. The Washington Post reported “Abuse Cited In 2nd Jail Operated by Iraqi Ministry”. For God’s sake! When is this going to end? Even if these people are criminals, who gave the interior ministry the right to do that? What is the benefit then from getting rid of Saddam then? The same is happening but previously was public and now it’s secret.

December 13

Today nothing really big happened except that O called me and I called him back. We were talking about how I am spending my time in the US and he was talking about the office in this period.

While I was reading the news, I was really thinking of the coming period in the Iraqi history. I am really worried about what is going to happen but the only thing I can do is to be optimistic. Maybe one day, I will have a normal day and maybe the children will have brighter future.

I really want to say that Iraqis are brave. They suffered and still suffering but they are still strong. Soldiers, police, and electoral commission employees are really doing their best to bring safety to this country. They are sacrificing their souls for a great goal, Iraq's full freedom. They know very well that their jobs are dangerous but they work, really work hard. I want to tell them I am so proud of them and I am proud to be Iraqi.

An Iraqi policeman escorts an election committee official carring a ballot box in Najaf, Iraq, Tuesday Dec. 13, 2005. Iraqis living abroad began voting Tuesday in the country's parliamentary elections, and election officials expressed satisfaction that early polling by soldiers, patients and prisoners was carried out without a hitch.(AP Photo/Alaa al-Marjani)

An Iraqi soldier checks a car in Baghdad, Iraq, Tuesday Dec.13, 2005. More than 1,000 Sunni clerics on Tuesday issued a religious edict, or fatwa, urging members of the minority to vote in this week's elections. The call came as violence marred the last day of campaigning, with one candidate killed and another narrowly missing an assassination attempt. (AP Photo/Mohammed Hato)

An election committee official places signs on ballot boxes as he prepares a polling station in Al-Sadr city, east of Baghdad, Iraq, Tuesday Dec. 13, 2005. Iraqis living abroad began voting Tuesday and election officials expressed satisfaction that early polling by soldiers, patients and prisoners was carried out around the country without a hitch. Political parties began a final round of rallies in Baghdad Tuesday, one day before campaigning was to stop around the country to give Iraqis time to reflect ahead of Thursday's Dec. 15 parliamentary elections. (AP Photo/Karim Kadim)

A soldier checks the identification card of an Iraqi driver at a checkpoint in Baghdad, Iraq, Tuesday Dec. 13, 2005. More than 1,000 Sunni clerics on Tuesday issued a religious edict, or fatwa, urging members of the minority to vote in this week's elections. The call came as violence marred the last day of campaigning, with one candidate killed and another narrowly missing an assassination attempt. (AP Photo/Mohammed Hato)

My Trip to the U.S.A. Treasure of Baghdad's Diary

December 11th

I woke up this morning at 9 a.m. after a long day in Manhattan. I took a shower and went out with Ivan to have breakfast and then go for a new tour in the city. Ivan suggested having breakfast in Café Lalo, between Broadway and Amsterdam Ave. From the outside in, the mood at Café Lalo is decidedly pseudo-European-light-strewn trees announce its presence on a brownstone-lined block and fin de siècle posters brighten the interior, though Central Perk-style oversized mugs and a track of throbbing house music give this meeting spot a decidedly youthful spin.

We had our breakfast and then went to a place where I really wanted to see during the day. It was the area where the World Trade Centers located. It was very cold to the extent that it was really hard to take off my gloves and take pictures. But I did it. When I arrived the metal fence surrounding the areas, I was really sad. I felt my heart sinking. Being familiar to violence and people crying for help, I imagined how these towers were falling and how horrified the people around them were. I kept asking myself, why?why?why? why there is no peace in this world? Damn you Osama. Damn you Zarqawi. You are bringing destruction to the world. But you will be finished, sooner or later. It’s just a matter of time.

Silent and sad, people gathered to look. They were like me, angry and sad. I was gazing and I noticed the Cross which was made out of the rails of the underground station. Oh my God! How many people died on this piece of metal that day. I prayed to the souls of the dead and the souls of those dying everyday in Iraq. Tears fell over my frozen cheeks. They were burning, really burning. Even now, I am writing and tears are surrounding my eyes. I just can’t believe what happened. They were civilians, just civilians like those who were killed by a bomber when they were having breakfast in a restaurant in Baghdad.

After that sad scene, we went to an adjacent clothes store, Century 21 department stores, also known as New York’s Best Kept Secret, which has more than 15 departments of sensational quality and designer merchandise at 25% to 75% off retail prices. It was huge and has almost everything with reasonable prices that I won’t even be able to get in Baghdad. I bought a Jacket, a wool scarf and a T-shirt. They cost me 70$ while if I bought them from other stores, they would cost me at least 140$. Ivan also bought several things. He said he didn’t have time to buy them until I came. After that we had lunch and returned back to his apartment to take my luggage and move to the new room the CPJ booked for me. We took the subway and arrived at 7 p.m.

Built in 1898, this 4 story Victorian Brownstone offers charming guest room style accommodations located in the heart of historic Carroll Gardens, Brooklyn. The room is very big and comfortable. The most important thing for me was the bathroom. It was very good.

Then, Ivan and I went out for dinner and to show me the road and the area where I am going to meet with Joel Simon, the CPJ deputy head to go to work together. We had dinner and then I returned back to the hotel. I thanked Ivan a lot for his generosity in making me staying in his house for four nights. I feel that what Ivan did and still doing is greater than “thank you”. He is a good man and I really respect him and hope one day I can help him at least half of what he did to me. I believe it is really rare to see people like him and it seems that I am so lucky to have him as a friend in the first place.

I returned back, took a shower, checked my emails and went to sleep preparing for a new busy day at the CPJ.

My Trip to the United States of America-Treasure of Baghdad's Diary

December 9, 2005

Last night when Ivan and I were returning back home, the weather was very cold. We were barely able to walk. I expected snow to fall the next day. My sense did not betray me. I woke up to see snow covers everything. I looked through the window and was delighted to see how snow painted the streets white.

I took a shower and then Ivan and I left to work. We arrived late a little bit because it was really hard to walk and take the subway. We arrived at about 10:10. as usual, we worked, had lunch and left home. This time, we returned back to the apartment to meet Sevan, Ivan’s brother whom I did not meet since I moved to Ivan’s apartment. Then the three of us went out for dinner. Ivan suggested going to Arte Café, an Italian restaurant where he had dinner with a friend few days ago. We went there and had lasagna and pizza. The food was delicious and the service at the restaurant was hilarious.

After dinner, Sevan wanted to buy some music CDs. So, our next step was Tower Records, a huge Music and DVD store in Broadway at Lincoln Center. I was amazed and spent almost an hour in that store. I bought three CDs including America’s top 20 chart-topping hits. By the way, I am listening to it now, “must be nice” by Lyfe Jennings, to be specific.

After that we returned back home.

VISITING HISTORY IN ONE PLACE

December 10, 2005

Today is another wonderful day I spent in New York City. As everybody knows that today is Saturday, the weekend in America. Ivan and I decided to go to the barber shop to get our hair cut. We went their and I was surprised to see a woman ready to cut my hair. It was very surprising to me as we, in Iraq, are used to have men cut our hair. I didn’t reject this idea but it was surprising to be frank. The woman did her job perfectly. Then we went to get some breakfast to take with us at home.

Today, we were supposed to meet Heidi at the Lincoln Center. We went and found her waiting for us at the gate of the New York State Theatre. Our trip today was to the Metropolitan Museum in NYC. Before going there, the three of us went to Starbucks and now instead of having my daily regular coffee, I had Gingerbread coffee that I really liked although it was the first time for me to taste. We took the bus and went to the Museum. When I stood at the steps of that lead to it, I was amazed. It was big and huge. Hundreds of men, women, children, old men and women were heading to see this big phenomenon. Some of them were sitting on the steps reading booklets that describe the museum.

The first thing I saw when I entered was the Egyptian civilization that brought attention to many people visiting it. I stood near a Mummy that was surrounded by many visitors from different countries in the world. When I was gazing, I imagined how this Mummy was a human being and an influential one in the Egyptian history. I immediately remembered O who is overwhelmed by the Egyptian civilization. I remembered how ridiculous it was when they did not allow him to take photos for the Mummies while a Western country like the United States allow people to take as much photos as they want.

People were fascinated by the amazing design of the museum that can make thousands look at the art without feeling bored. Most of the visitors had their cameras with them taking photos for the pieces they found great. Children stood next to the tombs and mummies, parents were happy to take the photos for them.

The Metropolitan Museum is like a living encyclopedia of world art. Every culture from every part of the world- from Florence to Thebes to Papua New Guinea- from the earliest times to the present and in every medium is represented. The Metropolitan’s two million square feet houses what is in fact the collection of collections.

Then, we reached one of the things that I couldn’t imagine or believe to see in New York. It was The Temple of Dendur which was erected by the Roman Emperor Augusts during his occupation to Egypt and Lower Nubia, the area south of modern Aswan. I asked if what I saw was real or not and I was shocked by the fact that it was one hundred percent real. They told me the bricks were transferred from Egypt to NYC. The sign near the temple reads that it came to the United States as a gift from Egypt in 1965 in recognition of the American contribution in the international campaign to save the ancient Numbian Monuments. I really wished O was with me at that moment to see it. I hope he would have the chance to see it one day.

We left this section and went to the European section where I saw the French reception room from the hotel De Cabris which was built between 1771 and 1774 by Jean Paul de Clapiers. Now, I remembered by my mother who is really overwhelmed by the European furniture specially the French and English.

While we were moving between the sections, I bought a bulky guide of the Museum and its contents to make my parents whom I really wanted them to see it, see how what is inside the Museum and how amazing it is.

The Arms and Armor department was another amazing part of the museum. This apartment includes fourteen thousand items, ranging in date from the fifth to through the nineteenth century. Armor and weapons, often embellished with precious metals and jewels, proclaimed the wearer’s social status, wealth, and taste. Western Europe and Japan are the areas most strongly represented, but the collection also contains significant material from North America, the Islamic countries, the Middle East and Asia.

Then we kept moving till we reached the Rembrandt paintings department. It was fascinating. Paintings by the Dutch artist were hanged to draw the attention of the gazing people. The painting of Aristotle with a Bust of Homer, Flora, woman with a pink and some other amazing portraits were so great to look at for at least 3 minutes for each.

I just don’t know what to say about how great this museum is.

After that, Heidi, Ivan and I took a taxi and went back to Lincoln center. We had dinner in one of the restaurants and then went to Starbucks again to have some coffee. After that she left to work in the New York State Theater. Ivan and I went to Time Square to look for a movie to watch. We finally found one in AMC Empire 25, “Just Friends”, a romantic comedy. It’s about a man comes face-to-face with old high school crush- a woman whose rejection to him turned him into a ferocious womanizer. It was so funny. Everyone watching laughed out loud.

After that we returned back to the apartment to get ready for a new adventure tomorrow, starting from me moving to a new apartment the CPJ rented for me.