Just Myself

I am lying in the bed sneezing, sweating and feeling freezing cold. Wrapped up by two blankets but still feeling cold. No one is around me, just myself. I looked at my parents pictures, closed my eyes for a second and felt my mother’s hand on my forehead. I heard her, I swear I did. She was wiping away the pain from my head. “You’ll be fine darling,” she was saying. I could smell the soup she cooked for me from our kitchen. My father was asking my sister about me. “How is he doing now?” I heard him saying too. I opened my eyes to tell him “I’ll be fine,” but found myself in another place. I looked around and found no one, but myself.

When People Testify...

Kathryn Helvenston’s son was sent to a mission from which he never returned. Scott Helvenston was one of the four Americans working for Blackwater in Iraq. They were ambushed and killed late march 2004 in Fallujah, a volatile city in western Iraq. The entire world watched the brutal episode of an enraged mob dragging the burned bodies through the city and hanged at least two corpses from a bridge over the Euphrates River.

“[Blackwater sent them out,” Helvenston said in a 75-minutes documentary, which was played in the International House of Pennsylvania University before an audience of 300. Iraq for Sale, the war profiteers is a documentary that depicts the lives of soldiers, truck drivers, widows and children that have been changed forever as a result of profiteering in the reconstruction of Iraq. It uncovers the connections between private corporations’ “bad” performance in Iraq and the decision makers who allow it all to happen

Hosted by the SEIU, the Service Employees International Union, the premier started with a reception and was followed by a panel in which the speakers were Robert Greenwald, producer and director of Iraq for Sale, Susan Burke, Human Rights Attorney, represents Abu Ghraib torture victims, Marwan Mawiri, a whistleblower and Former Titan translator in Iraq and Marie de Young, Halliburton Whistleblower who is running for state representative.

Accompanied by images of children playing, students going to schools, and U.S. soldiers fighting, the documentary starts with a transcript, “The film you are about to see could change the world. You have the power to change the world.” Pictures of Scott, Helvenston’s son followed. With tears raining on her cheeks, Helvenston’s son’s images backed up what she said. With his messy blond hair, Hollywood face and muscular build, Scott went to Iraq to work for Blackwater to earn money to support his children. Later, he became one of the victims.

Families of the four slain Americans filed charges against Blackwater setting responsibility of the incident on the private security firm.

“The vehicles should have been armored,” Katy said in a hint of accusation that Blackwater did not provide them with the appropriate plan and equipments. “And they also should have had saws, heavy belt fed machine guns in each vehicle, which they didn’t have. They also were supposed to have maps for their routes, they should have pre-planned their route which they weren’t given enough time [to do]”.

Blackwater did not talk about Falluja incident for a long time. However, eight days after the ambush, Patrick Toohey, a senior company executive told the New York Times that the company had already made changes in “Tactics, techniques and procedures.” Since the incident, Blackwater’s profits increased 600 fold.

“I am so angry that my son died but when I saw what Blackwater did,” Helvenston said. “I don’t know what to say,”

Across the hall and before the start of the movie, attendees expressed their disagreement to Bush’s Administrations plans. Standing next to the advertisement poster of the documentary at the reception, Michael Leone, an employee of the SEIU said the Bush Administration “has done a terrible job” in Iraq. For him, this administration has ignored “the majority of the [American] people” and concentrated on Bush’s friends. “They allowed companies like Halliburton which receives benefits from contracts with billions of dollars by the time hundreds of thousands of American laborers are ignored,” Leone said.

Halliburton, once fined with $1.5 million for violations in early 1990s, is one of the contracting companies mentioned in the documentary as a profiteer from the ongoing war in Iraq . Ben Carter, a KBR/Halliburton former water Purification Specialist, showed up on the screen to testify. Carter went to Iraq to support the troops and reconstruction efforts. Yet soon after he arrived in Iraq , he found KBR/Halliburton cutting essential corners. Carter eventually found the water being supplied to troops was severely contaminated. "I went over there and that's where my eyes were opened,” Carter said with tear drops falling. “Within the first day that I was in Iraq I started to see just incredible waste and compromised safety standards.”

On January 23rd of this year, Carter testified before the senate. In his testimony, Carter said although he was hired to work as a water treatment specialist, he was not allowed to inspect Al-Ramadi water delivery systems until “more than a month after I arrived at the base.” After testing the water used by the Marines, “the test results indicated zero presence of chlorine.”

“We have to take care of our troops and civilians,” said Marie deYoung, a former Army chaplain who is running for PA State representatives. “If the [administration] listened to senior army generals, they would have helped Iraqis and Americans twice. Instead, the strategy was based on only what Bush, Rumsfeld, and Cheney said,” she said. “Profits were taken on the expense of U.S. soldiers and Iraqis,” she added.

In 2003, deYoung was hired by her former commanders who worked as Halliburton executives to perform “executive officer” functions for military commanders in Kosovo, and later, to assist with contract management in Kuwait . Senior Halliburton executives moved Marie to the Kuwait Headquarters to assist with the clean-up of the Kuwait subcontracts department. While there, she uncovered specific acts of fraud that she reported to Halliburton management. When it became clear that Halliburton executives were not correcting the systemic pattern of overcharges, but were “closing out” accounts to avoid audit detection, she took her concerns to Congressman Henry Waxman’s office and later testified before Congress. “We are working to do changes in government to get a better policy,” she said.

Truck drivers, former U.S. soldiers and officers, and former employees testified against KBR/Halliburton’s performance and accused them of being profiteers on the expense of the U.S. troops fighting in Iraq .

Whenever the war in Iraq is mentioned, Abu Ghraib prison scandal arises. Investigators and former army officers testify in the documentary about how a U.S. contracting company employees took part in abusing Iraqi detainees in 2004. Janis Karpinsky, a former Brigadier General at Abu Ghraib began to put the pieces of the puzzle together when she saw the photographs. “I became aware of this, these CACI interrogators on the 23rd of January 2004 when I saw the photographs for the first time. And I said to the commander of the criminal investigation division, who was showing them to me, I said, ‘Why are the translators around the prisoners? Why are the translators in the cell block?’ And he said, ‘Ma'am, those aren't translators. Those are CACI interrogators.’ I said, ‘Translators?’ He said, ‘No, interrogators.’”

Along with the images of the abused Iraqi detainees, Hassan al-Azzawi, a torture victim at Abu Ghraib, said he was abused by men in civilian clothes. "There was a person wearing civilian clothes, and giving them orders. I think he belonged to the private companies,” Azzawi said in the documentary in a hint to CACI, the California Analysis Center. “Then they cuffed my hands again, and they ripped my clothes in a savage way, even my underwear, I stayed naked, totally naked," he added.

The real-life abuses at Abu Ghraib prison are played out for the first time in the world of cinema in a controversial Turkish movie called Valley of the Wolves Iraq. In the movie, there are episodes where U.S. contractors abuse and kill Iraqi detainees in Abu Ghraib prison facility. The Turkish movie caused a big debate here in the United States.

Since the war broke up in 2003, more than 2500 U.S. soldiers were killed in action in Iraq. The increasing number of the death toll resulted in different points of views among the American people. “I rejected this war form the beginning,” said Christine Coey, 52. “We don’t know the country, the people and the background of the people. That ignorance causes the death of our sons and daughters who are fighting [in Iraq],” said Coey who works in a food store. However, Christine Opes disagrees with Coey. “Although we are losing troops there, we have to win. War is always difficult,” said Opes who works as a first class cleaner.

Other attendees blamed President Bush for all the problems happening in the U.S. and Iraq . “[Bush] is the main cause of problems,” said Bernice Washington who came to watch the documentary. “He sent our troops for oil, not for freedom. He continues what his father started in the Gulf War in 1991.”

After screening the movie, anger over the subject sparkled among the audience. Some people left the theater furious at the security firm.

“Horrible,” said Rosetta Johnson, a dietary aide. “Halliburton should be brought to justice. They are taking advantage of our troops.”

baghdadtreasure@gmail.com

From a "Free" Country to a Free Country...

Leaving Baghdad...

It’s been eight months since the last time I came to the United States. Time passed so quickly in Baghdad despite the daily ordeal and struggle to live and work in a country falling apart day after day.

In Baghdad, I worked day and night to save for my upcoming education. As may some of you know that I am going to study the M.A. in Writing Studies. In the dairy I wrote last winter, I mentioned that I visited one of the universities in Philadelphia and met with the director of admissions who strongly encouraged me to apply for the graduate studies and that’s what I did.

I did all my best to stay alive. I increased the precaution measures to make it safe to America. It wasn’t easy, not at all. I wanted everything to be perfect to go study and make my family proud of me. Being away from them is hard but being among them unsafe is even harder.

My mother, who was always worried about me especially when the civil war reached its peak, was more than worried. She wanted me to go to a safer country until I finish my university paperwork. It was really hard to convince her that I needed the money I got from my job. “I’ll sell everything to get money to make you safe and out of here,” she told me several times.

My father was hiding his fears. He was so happy that I am going to achieve two things out of this new life: get out safe and get a higher degree from an international university. It reminded him with Iraq’s golden age back in the seventies when he was able to go study in Leeds in England.

I received all my necessary documents, including the ones the university sent, by July 10. “No need to wait,” parents insisted and I agreed. I booked on the nearest flight from Baghdad to Amman. I needed to go to Jordan to apply for an interview at the US embassy to get the student visa and go to the U.S. afterwards. The biggest U.S. embassy in the world, which is in Baghdad, does not give any services to Iraqi citizens.

Amman...

I think you’ve read about the biggest thing that happened in Amman, meeting up with most of the Iraqi bloggers. Amman is boring to the bone and the Jordanians are mean to the bone. They hate Iraqis.

By the time I met with my Iraqi blog friends, I had the visa interview done. I can’t lie and say I wasn’t worried. Many things are happening in the Middle East that has to do with America and the Arab world. However, the interview went more than perfect. I didn’t have to wait for months like what happened to some students. Instead, the consular said I am qualified. She issued me the visa on the same day.

Travel plans started again. 24 Steps and I bought plane tickets immediately after we got our visas in the passports. This time we are going to be really far from our families and beloved ones. It’s going to be even harder for us. The night before we left was really hard for me to endure. It was even harder from the night I left Baghdad. Tears were hard to be stopped from falling. When I called my parents, I wished I could go back and be among them. They are alone there. They can’t even see my relatives easily anymore. They are stuck in the house without going anywhere but the market which they go to for no more than 15 minutes to buy necessary stuff. My father told me several things I should do and my mother encouraged me a lot to be strong and do my best in school which I promised them of.

Washington D.C.

By now, my new life has started. Washington D.C. was my first step. Due to all news about how tight the security measures are and how Arabs are “monitored”, I expected to be stuck at the airport for at least three hours like what happened to me last year. I was prepared for this. I had nothing wrong to be afraid of. Let it take ten hours. I have all my documents. When I submitted my passport and documents, they asked me to have a seat. Five minutes later, the officer said, “you are all set. Welcome to America.” I was really surprised. Just five minutes?! That’s really not bad.

I got my baggage and went to the waiting hall where R., our friend and former Bureau chief was waiting for us. Suddenly, I heard a shout of a woman. She ran towards me. “Oh my god!” I was shouting and jumping out of happiness as I was hugging her tightly. It was Jill, of course. I was really happy to see her. She came all the way from Boston to meet us along with R.

Philadelphia...

I stayed one day in D.C. and took the train the next day to Philadelphia. P., J2’s husband was waiting for me. He took me to their house first where I saw J2, one of my best friends who helped me greatly in getting accepted as a graduate student by the University. It was a great day I spent with them.

The next day, I went to the university. I had many things to do starting from the first thing which is to be reported as attended to school on time. I don’t want to have any immigration problems.

On the first weekend, I had free time. J2 was busy with some important stuff. So I didn’t want to bother her and her family. On Saturday, I woke up at 8 a.m., dressed up, and went out for a tour in the city. I didn’t know what to do first. Then, I decided to go to downtown Philadelphia. At the orientation, I was advised to take the bus and that’s what I actually did.

The downtown looked incredibly gorgeous. The skyscrapers, fountains, streets, fountains, statues, and everything looked so beautiful. Philadelphia’s impressive and massive City Hall could never be avoided from seeing. The area around the city Hall was fascinating. It was full of work of art which is believed to be more than in any other city in the United States. On the way to Center Square Plaza at 15^th street and Market streets, I could decide for myself. Market street was my favorite stop. I spent more than three hours in this street between drinking coffee at Starbucks and shopping in K-Mart and some other stores.

It’s been almost a month since I arrived to Philly. I am settled now in my new apartment which J2 found for me. It’s just across the street from campus. I don’t have a roommate because I am a person who loves his privacy.

I spent the last weekend with a friend of mine, an American reporter whom we worked together in Baghdad. He came from Boston to attend a wedding of a relative of his friend. We met on Sunday. He took me to Pat’s, Philadelphia’s most famous cheese stakes’ restaurants. We took the cab to Pat’s. on the way, the nosy taxi driver asked us where we come from? My friend told him that he came from Boston and that I came from Baghdad. Silence followed. “Oh the enemy, you mean? I should report you to the CIA!” the driver said. I can’t deny that I was not surprised. He was the first American who reacted like this in front of me. Most of Philadelphia’s people are liberal and that’s what made me love this city. I wonder if Iraq invaded

It did not surprise me to get such reaction. He is one of the millions of Americans who watch TV only. I wasn’t surprised to see how the U.S. TV stations poorly cover the war in Iraq. Since I was in Iraq, I read how small number of American people knows what is really happening. I’ve been watching the news channels for about a month and I have never seen a report on Iraq for more than five minutes. Even the five minutes report showed part of the U.S.-Iraqi military second sweep that started in Baghdad after the failure of the first one few months ago.

Anyway, I think that was a long entry. It’s 2 a.m. here. I have to go to sleep. I have piles of assignments, papers, news to read and some other things to do! Have a nice weekend.

baghdadtreasure@gmail.com